"Bobbie" based on an actual account...
When I interviewed my son's nanny (who I hired over the phone), she told me she was sane and had no bad habits or health problems, but she in fact had narcolepsy (can't stay awake), bone cancer, breast cancer, osteoporosis, was afraid of the dark, drank 22 cups of coffee a day, smoked like a chimney, cursed like a sailor, thought she was a psychic and is now dead. God love her, I miss her. 

"Tar Bubbles" an autobiography...
"Bless me Father for I have sinned. My last confession was a few days before yesterday, which was the 4th of July 1966.  These are my sins:  I lied.  I said some bad words.  Last time I was here I forgot to confess that I accidentally stole a drumstick ice cream bar from old man Reins'grocery store because I didn't have enough money since I only stole one dime from my dad's change bag, which was only enough to pay for the sunflower seeds and the Zero candy bar. I cheated playing cards with my little brother Roy and took his money.  I traded my First Holy Communion prayer book, rosary, Holy cards, pin, purse with the pretty white silk flowers on it and that doily thing for my head that Mom makes me wear in church, all for a plastic camera from rich Kathy in my class. Oh, and my fat cousin Johnny and I blew up all of the frogs in my grandma's pond yesterday with gunpowder we dug out of the leftover firecrackers we found. That's about it, I think."